One Saturday when my brother and my sister in law were visiting, we spent an evening with my parents. Dad made a fire and we made smores.
Apparently they accidentally bought MASSIVE MARSHMALLOWS.
In the days of ordering groceries and picking them up from the store, that kind of mistake is totally understandable but way more rad than the mistakes my roommate and I get. … like mini detail brushes instead of the dish brushes we needed.
The way a person roasts their marshmallows says a lot about them. I'd hoped to learn a thing or two from my SIL since she's taking culinary arts courses. But turns out I was a little focused on my game plan for THE BIG MALLOW.
Thing about mallows is they're sugar, whipped egg whites, and gelatin. Them bubbles in there make em fluffy and soft. They're also the key to getting the perfect goo all the way through.
This first crucial step takes patience. You must slowly rotate the mallow over red coals until it inflates. This step is most effective when you have a distracted friend nearby who can come back and go "IT GOT HUUUUGE!!" like you worked some ridiculous magic on the thing. This isn't magic, it's science. The heat makes the bubbles in the meringue expand and it loosens the gelatin so the bubbles get big. For full inner goo, the head should reach even the very center of the mallow.
Second, a warning. The fluffing process severely compromises the structural integrity of the mallow. It will drop clean off the stick if its allowed to. Double-pronged sticks are best, and constant rotation is helpful. Think rotisserie chicken.
Last comes the Great Crisping. A smore marshmallow, and really most hot sugary treats, is golden brown and crispy. Everybody's got their desired light/dark crust preferences, but this method works for any of it - from light to full soot black. Put that full goo marshmallow in the yellow part of the fire flame and turn it quickly in there until its your favorite shade and if it catches flame - blow it out and resume if its not your shade yet.
Finally, eat it. I just ate mine. It was delicious. With a little ball of unmelted mallow in the middle, which was ok considering the massive size of the thing.
My engineer brother made a smore. Like a real smore with Graham crackers and Hershey's chocolate. He halved the massive mallow between two and shared one half with Dad.
Dad said something about how he wished it were easier to get the chocolate melted with the heat of a marshmallow alone, like one imagines or sees in the movies, and my brother said we can get close to the 'ideal smore' but… its impossible to quite reach it with the criteria of a traditional campfire set up. "Y'know," he said, "like an asymptote."
My dad awarded him a few verbal points for a math reference.
I personally think an 'ideal smore' should be different for every person. I've seen enough of those 'behind the scenes of food commercials' videos to be sure whatever we may think is ideal in a s'more is actually hot glue or some charred plastic.
So I'll eat my crispy goo mallow, thanks, all on its own.
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